“Pity was meant to be a spur that drives joy to help misery. But it can be used the wrong way round. It can be used for a kind of blackmailing. Those who choose misery can hold joy up to ransom, by pity.”

C.S. Lewis, The Great Divorce

Selfish Desires Choke Out Joy

How often do we let martyr syndrome get in the way of enjoying life? Sometimes we are tempted to pout in the face of adversity because throwing guilt on other people feels better than realistically pondering our circumstances. It is human nature to deflect blame, but how often does that deflection keep us from growing? How often does it keep us trapped in cycles of self-inflicted misery?

C.S. Lewis writes, “The choice of every lost soul can be expressed in the words ‘Better to reign in Hell than serve in Heaven.’ There is always something they insist on keeping, even at the price of misery. There is always something they prefer to joy–that is reality.” This reference to Satan’s dialogue in John Milton’s Paradise Lost expounds on Lewis’s point that we must choose to live in a difficult reality. By taking accountability for our mistakes, we can enjoy more triumphs earned through our purposefulness. Embrace your reality. Take charge of the story you’ve been handed. Live for something bigger than yourself.